Day 0 – I Finally Stopped Hiding (or I’m still a bitch)

The public execution of the old me begins now.

I’ve been hiding for years.

Felonies.
Blown-up trading accounts.
Suicide attempts that should have worked.
A brain that goes molten hot for six weeks and then ice-cold the second it gets boring.
A sister who keeps the lights on so I never have to feel real consequences.

Ketamine therapy was the only thing that ever broke through the noise.
In the void I met something that felt like God, and it laughed at how small my life had become.

So now I’m finishing the book I’ve been carrying around like a corpse: Ketamine & Koans.

I will post every single day — here and on X — until it’s done.
Raw. Unfiltered. No pretty little bows.

If I miss a day, I will Venmo $100 to the first person who calls me a bitch in the comments.
Real money. Real stakes. Because comfort is what killed me the first 47 times.

Day 1 starts tomorrow.

Subscribe (free or paid, I don’t care yet) or just watch me fail again.
Either way, the show is finally on.

Andrei
@AndreiMellas
Inside the void